b Papa Dog's Blog: Gosh Darn it, I Missed the Staff Meeting! Fudge!

Papa Dog's Blog

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Thursday, March 10, 2005

Gosh Darn it, I Missed the Staff Meeting! Fudge!

I know the answer, but I’ll ask anyway: whose dumbass idea was it to have an afternoon-long staff meeting, followed by rah rah morale boosting drinks at some miserable nearby financial district watering hole…on a Thursday afternoon? The aim of this is…what?…hungover sickout Friday? This is how much I wasn’t anxious to endure three hours worth of Powerpoint Presentations on Our Plans for 2005: I chose instead to sit at my desk and do my work. Not just any work, mind you – reformatting about 25 project descriptions. Unless you’re Charles or another of my former compatriots, you’ll just have to take my word for it – this is one of the dullest tasks in a none-too-spine tingling profession. Entering a year’s worth of pumping volume figures in a spreadsheet might be worse, but not by much. I would have picked even that over a three-hour staff meeting.

Even with legitimate work to do, I figured it couldn’t hurt to take extra measures against the caprices of management. You never know when they’re going to decide one of these stupid things is mandatory. So, on went the headset and up went the volume. Plausible deniability: I could truthfully say I never heard the announcement that the meeting was starting. And if nobody looked at my desk calendar (clearly written: March 10 – Staff meeting, 2:30-5:30), I could claim I’d forgotten all about it. For once, nobody made the office-wide sweep for stragglers, so I was home free. Thank you, Charles, for the Johnny Cash covers. Thank you, volume button, for locating yourself so conveniently on the headset cord.

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